What I learned from my empowerment strategist

GNT #126: What I learned from my empowerment strategist

life design mindset personal growth Jun 26, 2025

read time: 4.5 minutes

In 2024, I got a thoughtful message on LinkedIn from Kate Ferrian.

She had stumbled across my profile, started reading this newsletter, and reached out to say thanks.

Kate had just launched her own business, Simply Become It, and I was intrigued by how she described the empowerment journey she took her clients through. 

We had a virtual coffee chat, and I could tell right away: this wasn’t just a kind person. This was someone who deeply understood what it means to live in alignment with your values and show up with intention.

Kate is an Empowerment Strategist.

And after learning more about the work she does—helping women reconnect with their strengths, rewire limiting beliefs, and lead from a place of grounded self-trust—I knew I wanted to experience it for myself.

This wasn’t about “fixing” anything. It was about understanding who I am beneath the noise, and learning how to build habits, boundaries, and decisions that come from a place of clarity, not pressure.

In today’s newsletter, I’m sharing:

  • What this journey actually looked like (it’s more structured than you might think)

  • The biggest shifts I experienced

  • And the tools I still use today to check in with myself and lead more intentionally

If you’re craving more clarity, peace, or purpose in your work or life—this might be the nudge you’ve been waiting for.

Let’s dig in.
 

I didn’t need more strategy. I needed more self-awareness.

Going into this, I already had the tools for purposeful business growth, marketing, and well-being. But something still felt off.

It wasn’t burnout, but it was close. I felt like I could go deeper into the internal work that would bring more meaning and alignment to how I was living and leading.

This journey helped me see the root of that misalignment—and gave me a framework to shift.

We started by exploring my energetic and personality wiring:

These weren’t just interesting labels. They revealed real patterns in how I was moving through life and business.

And they helped me name something I hadn’t yet fully admitted:

I was using my strengths in ways that were draining me.

Empathy, adaptability, drive—they're all great qualities. But left unchecked, they had me shape-shifting, overcommitting, focusing more on the external than the internal, and quietly burning out in service of everyone but myself.

I met my saboteurs—and started shifting my inner narrative

Next, we uncovered the behaviors I’d built to survive: over-delivering, controlling outcomes, and internal guilt spirals.

Using a tool called the Saboteurs Assessment, I met the internal cast of characters that show up when I’m stressed or out of alignment—like the Controller, the Stickler, and the Restless Achiever.

But these parts of me weren’t “bad.” They were trying to protect something more tender underneath.

That’s where Parts Work (also known as Internal Family Systems, or IFS) came in.

IFS is based on the idea that we all have different “parts” within us—each with its own story, fear, and role. Some protect. Some avoid. Some ache. Some lead.

With Kate’s support, I met my "inner fierce protector"—the part of me keeping everything in motion so that the young, hurt girl (the part that still feared she wasn’t enough to be loved) didn’t have to feel exposed.

Instead of trying to “fix” those patterns, I started meeting them with compassion and curiosity. And that’s when things began to shift—how I made decisions, how I defined enough, and how I treated myself when things got hard.

I started making decisions from alignment, not obligation

This journey wasn’t just reflective. It was deeply tactical. (I loved that part of it!!)

We didn’t just journal and move on. We practiced daily.

  • I started checking in with my body before saying yes

  • I began aligning my calendar with how I wanted to feel, not just what I had to do

  • I caught myself when I was “helping” out of guilt or avoidance, and chose presence instead

It wasn’t always perfect. But it was honest.

And I learned something that stuck with me:

Feeling in control of your life requires an unreasonable amount of honesty.
 

The tools I still use

What I loved about this journey was that it wasn’t a one-time reset. It became part of the personal operating system I rely on daily.

The Wheel of Life

This simple tool helped me see that while I was showing up in purpose and work, I had sidelined connection and joy. I was unintentionally deprioritizing time with Ed and real fun.

That awareness led to concrete changes:

  • More weekly check-ins with Ed

  • Scheduling fun first, not last

  • Redefining what “productive” actually means to me

You can use the link above to complete your free Wheel of Life assessment.

My Parts Work & IFS
With Kate’s support, I stopped intellectually understanding IFS—and started living it.

Now, when I feel pulled to over-function, I pause and ask:

“Who’s driving the bus right now?”

That one question resets me more effectively than any productivity trick ever has.

It’s given me language for my inner world—and a way to respond from clarity instead of habit.


My Personal Empowerment GPT

Yes, I literally use AI to coach myself.

Kate helped me distill all of my assessments, saboteurs, values, and journaling into a custom-trained GPT that knows me.

It supports me with:

  • Personalized journaling prompts

  • Clarity when I’m stuck in a decision

  • Insights on which saboteur or part may be showing up

  • Reconnection to my values when I feel scattered

Sometimes I use voice mode and just stream-of-consciousness my way through whatever’s on my mind. It’s like having a mindset mirror that responds with my own inner wisdom.



Takeaway

Here’s what I want you to know:

If you’re constantly striving but something still feels misaligned…
If you’re tired but not sure why…
If you’ve done the productivity thing, the vision boards, the mindset resets…
…and you still don’t feel at home in your life—

You’re not broken. You’re just ready to go deeper.

This work helped me find clarity in places I didn’t know I was lost. And it helped me reconnect with who I am underneath it all.

If that resonates, check out Kate’s work at SimplyBecomeIt.com. I'm grateful for the role she played in helping me find my way back.


I’m always rooting for you. 

๐Ÿ“ฉ If you’ve found value in this newsletter, the greatest thank-you you could give me is to share it with a friend.

p.s. I’ll be back in your inbox in August!

I’m out in July on a motorhome adventure with Ed, the kids, and our Luna pup this month...soaking in the quiet, the chaos, and the creative reset that comes from stepping away. Can’t wait to return with fresh stories and perspective.

Until then, wishing you your version of adventure. ๐Ÿ’›


 

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If you liked this article, you might also like:

GNT #091: My 3 Alarms
GNT #106: How I Use Cognitive Deletion
GNT #111: How I’m right-sizing my self-expectations

 

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