GNT #118: 3 phrases I'm obsessed with

read time: 3.5 minutes

I’ve been obsessed with Dr. Becky Kennedy lately.

Not a casual fan—I'm talking full-on note-taking, podcast-pausing, texting-friends-quotes obsessed.

She’s known for helping parents raise emotionally resilient kids, but her tools are just as powerful in business and life.

Because here's what I've noticed in my own work:

The hardest moments usually aren't about the right strategy.
They're about what didn't get said.
That feeling after a meeting when something was...off.
When the tone shifts, someone pulls back, or there's unspoken tension hanging in the air.

These moments used to trip me up.

Now, they're when I reach for what Dr. Becky calls connection tools. Specific language that creates emotional safety, trust, and forward momentum.

Today I'm sharing 3 phrases I'm now using regularly that have changed how I lead, coach, collaborate, and communicate.

They're not magic. But they're pretty darn close.

Let's get to it.

1. “I’m so glad you’re talking to me about this.”

I used this in a client meeting a while ago, right after they told me they were second-guessing part of the strategy we had just mapped out.

They were hesitant, almost apologetic. I could tell they were bracing for pushback or defensiveness.

Instead, I paused and said

"I'm so glad you're talking to me about this."

It felt like their shoulders dropped. It completely changed the tone.

It was like saying: You're not being difficult. You're being honest. And that's what we need here.

This phrase takes the heat out of the moment. It tells the other person that their feedback, concern, or discomfort isn't a threat to me—it's valuable.

I use it when:

• A teammate gives feedback
• A client or boss says something they're unsure about
• Someone speaks up after staying quiet for a while

 💡 Try it: If your instinct is to explain or defend, stop. Use this line first. You might be surprised how much more productive the conversation becomes.

2. "I believe you."

I once coached a founder who got emotional in a session about how overwhelmed they felt and how ashamed they were to admit it.

They were clearly afraid I'd think they couldn't handle it.

A version of me a few years ago might have jumped in with a pep talk or advice.

But I said:

"I believe you."

Not "Here's what you should do."
Just acknowledgement without conditions.

"I believe you" is one of the fastest ways to defuse shame. It's especially powerful when someone is questioning themselves because it affirms their experience without requiring you to agree or fix anything. It reinforces that, deep down, their feelings are real. They are real.

I use it when:

• Someone is sharing a powerful emotion
• A client expresses fear or self-doubt
• You sense someone is looking for reassurance, but not advice.

💡Try it: When someone is telling you how something felt, even if you don't fully understand it, try "I believe you." 

3. "Tell me more."

I was on a call where someone gave half-baked feedback.

They didn’t love something, but couldn’t explain why.

Instead of defending the work, I asked

“Can you tell me more?”

That’s when the real feedback came out. It wasn’t the work. It was the timing that had them stressed.

Different problem. Different solution.

This phrase is a conversation extender. It creates breathing room for people to clarify what they mean without pressure or escalation.

It also shows that you're curious, which often draws out insights people didn’t even realize they were holding back.

I use it when:

• Feedback is vague and you want to understand the real issue
• You sense tension but aren't sure what it's about
• You want to slow down a conversation that feels reactive

💡Try it: Next time something feels off or confusing in a conversation, resist the urge to interpret. Just say "Tell me more." And actually listen.

Takeaway

Sometimes you just need the right words at the right moment. Words that calm the nervous system, build trust, and keep the conversation open.

These 3 phrases:

“I’m so glad you’re talking to me about this.”

“I believe you.”

“Tell me more.”

…are small but powerful.

They help people feel safe. When people feel safe, they show up more honestly, more creatively, and more human.

That's where the real growth begins.
 

Keep digging into life, my friend. See you next Thursday.

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If you liked this article, you might also like:

GNT #096: The Power of Self-Worth Theory
GNT #092: Six Life Lessons I Wish I'd Heard Sooner
GNT #076: My System for Changing Deep Beliefs

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